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Ugly Women and Men and the Issue of Sexual Attraction

 
 

People feel sexually attracted to other people on account of a number of physical traits that could be identified, at the level of each individual, as pleasant and seductive. This means that physical appearance has the greatest influence on determining the type of partner we want, at least in the beginning of an intimate, erotic relationship. As a result, we are prompted into categorizing people into ugly men and ugly women. However, this identification only depends on individual preferences.



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We see, hear and smell other people; we do this on a daily basis, sometimes without even being aware of it. Sometimes unwillingly, other times deliberately, we tag other people on account of what our senses tell us about them. If their physical appearance reveals anything that we could label as unpleasant, we tend to immediately dismiss any association between beauty and the individual we are examining. However, which are the characteristics that make us differentiate between ugly women/ugly men and their beautiful counterparts?

First of all, an adequate, uniform body stance, lacking visible, major physical imperfections, is likely to determine us to label such as presence as an agreeable one. On the contrary, if there is something that ruins this uniformity, we tend to instantly detect something that reminds us of ugliness. For instance, there are many women who are tall and well-built; they have the perfect complexion, the perfect legs and breasts, and the perfect lips and eyes, and yet they are labeled as ugly women simply because their faces are "decorated", in some of the most incredible manners, by literally misshaped noses, too big or too crooked, making them look like evil sorceresses or strangely nosed animals.

The same happens with some of the ugly men we meet. The point is that a single detail is enough to destroy what could otherwise be called a pleasant posture. However, even a single detail turns into something uninviting that cannot be ignored if it is visible. On the other hand, there are ugly people in the posture of whom we cannot identify but rarely some minor details that could be said to be beautiful. It is amazing how one uncomely detail can contribute to a general categorization into ugly women or ugly men and, on the contrary, how one beautiful detail is not sufficient to "redeem" individuals from their identification as ugly people. 



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Why is it more difficult for agreeable, beautiful features to stand out from a mass of ugly characteristics? Why is it so easy for ugly features to cast a veiling shadow over beautiful characteristics and to make us forget everything about beauty? Truth be told, it all depends on how we are educated and on the environment we spend most of our time. In time, we tend to acquire the same standards of labeling as those shared by those around us. If most of the people in the company of whom we live think that a fat woman is an ugly woman, then so do we, even if somewhere else there are people (both men and women) who are not disturbed by a bit of fat. On the contrary, they even find it appealing.

In the end, the whole point is that sexual attraction is practically absent where one of the two potential partners identifies something as ugly in the appearance of the other. However, there are many people who don't mind a nose a lot bigger than the usual standards as long as the face and the body that carry such a nose are otherwise unblemished. Truth be told, no one is searching for perfection. They are only looking for someone whose body should display as little or as few imperfections as possible. Even ugly women and ugly men could back up such a statement; if they are ugly, it doesn't necessarily mean they are attracted to ugliness.



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